Kayla’s 22nd Birthday Poem

kayla Christmas ornamentToday is Christmas Eve and Kayla’s 22nd birthday.  While anticipating this difficult day, I wrote a poem to honor my daughter and to help me get through missing her today.






T’was the morning before Christmas;
still dark in the house.
something was stirring
and it wasn’t a mouse.
The blankets and sleepers
were folded with care;
I thought I was ready,
but, I wasn’t prepared.
As I slowly rolled out of my bed,
I had no idea what was ahead.
Discomfort and stress
had fallen in my lap.
What was I to do?
There were still presents to wrap.
As the pain became harder
I wondered what was the matter.
I looked in the mirror,
“Wow! I’m getting fatter and fatter!”
Away to the car, I flew like a flash.
I had to be quick
and tried not to crash.
Racing through red lights
while the pain continued to grow.
I was almost there;
just a few miles to go.
As the pain progressed,
it was perfectly clear;
it was time for the arrival
and to let go of my fear.
Pushing and hurting
with tears in my eyes;
I was anxious to see
my Christmas surprise.

When what do my wondering
eyes did appear;
my first born child
with no worries and no fears.
A girl with blue eyes and bright
red hair;
weighing only 5 lbs
and skin that was fair.
I looked at my girl with happy tears;
I didn’t know I’d only have her
for 17 years.
My time with you was far too short
and I wish I had another day;
I look forward to seeing you again
and I’ll never let you go away.
I wish I could see you in Heaven
to hug and say to you…
Merry Christmas, Kayla
And Happy Birthday, too.




About MomMinus1

Welcome to my blog, momminus1 (mom minus one). I am a mother of three beautiful girls, Kayla 17, Allison 13 and Ashley 5. One of my daughters recently became an angel; Kayla passed away on September 22, 2010 due to complications from AML leukemia. She was diagnosed on July 3, 2010. She endured harsh chemotherapy treatments, hair loss, rare and painful skin disorders, horrible stomach infections, weakness, loss of appetite, depression, anxiety and fear. From the time she was diagnosed until the day she died it was just 81 days..... A short, but, horrific battle with cancer. I am always asked, "How are you doing? What can I do for you? How are your two girls doing?" At times, these are tough questions to answer. And, I express myself best when I write. Writing is so helpful and therapeutic for me. Maybe I can answer these questions for those that are concerned about us. Maybe I can help another mom that might wake up tomorrow and find out that their child is diagnosed with cancer. Maybe there is a mom somewhere, like me, that just lost a child to cancer and is searching the web for answers. She might be thinking, "Is there anyone out there that understands what I'm going through?" I understand. I am grieving. I am in pain. I have a big piece of my heart that is now gone.....I would love your feedback about my blog, too. Thanks for reading!
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4 Responses to Kayla’s 22nd Birthday Poem

  1. Beautiful beyond words Amber. I know Kayla is with Alexa celebrating with Jesus.

  2. Beautiful Amber…Alexa and Kayla are celebrating with Jesus..we will get to them.
    Happy Birthday Kayla

  3. Lisa Ruprecht says:

    Beautiful xoxo

  4. SusanB says:

    That was absolutely tremendous Amber, sweet and well written tribute to Kayla. I believe she’s read it too.

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