I would like to take a few moments and introduce myself. I am a blessed mother of three beautiful daughters. You may remember my oldest daughter, Kayla. In 2010, you chose her as another childhood cancer victim.
I do realize that you are extremely busy and most likely preoccupied with an aggressive search to invade another child. But, you have been consistently on my mind for months and I knew it was time for me to contact you and share my thoughts and feelings regarding your destruction to thousands of children and their families, including mine.
Ruthless, cruel, wicked, merciless, damaging, deceptive, heartbreaking; these are just some of the words that I can think of to describe you. You made the very selfish and callous decision to choose my beautiful daughter to be diagnosed with leukemia and then to die from its complications. Did you ever think about Kayla’s thoughts, feelings, life goals, family, or her future while you were attacking her immune system? However, there is no reason to respond; I already know the answer to that question.
Since you decided to give Kayla this horrible illness, I thought you might want to learn a little bit about her. She was intelligent, loving, strong-willed, determined and beautiful inside and out. Not even her hair loss from chemotherapy changed her beauty. If anything, her crystal blue eyes became more prominent and captivating when she had no hair. She was also was the oldest sibling to Allison and Ashley who admired and loved their sister dearly. She was the first grandchild of my parents, the first niece of my sister and my first-born. Her grades were exceptional and the sky would have been the limit for her education and future. And, the one thing that she wanted more than anything was just to turn 18-years-old. However, you walked into her life at the tender age of 17 and destroyed her chance of ever becoming an adult and ruined any other future accomplishments she could have made with her life. Why was it Kayla?
Kayla and I were just beginning to reach a better place with our mother-daughter relationship when you entered our lives. And, we did have our share of parent/teen arguments and heated discussions. But, I always knew where I stood with her and where she was coming from. I never had to guess with Kayla because she would tell me exactly how she felt and it didn’t matter if I liked it or not. I know that most parents would not tolerate any type of disrespect such as this. But, now that she’s gone, I’m so glad that I allowed her to say whatever was on her mind. I now embrace the many memories of her stubbornness and determination to be heard. I can actually feel her push me to write this letter to you. I can almost hear Kayla say one of her many catch phrases , “This is just nonsense.”
Strategically, you slipped into Kayla’s bloodstream. Maliciously, you ceased her ability to fight back. Silently, you ended her life. You accomplished your brutal and destructive goal with my daughter. However, there are some things that you can never take away from me; my memories and my love for Kayla and the fact that she will always be a sister, granddaughter, and my daughter.
In closing, I hope that you will find this letter as an accurate explanation of my hostility and resentment toward you. I want you to know that I will continue on with my life as I reluctantly pull myself out of bed each day; I am reminded daily that Kayla died from cancer before my feet even touch the floor every single morning. It’s so painful, but, I have to keep going for my kids.
I will continue to pray that your ability to attack our precious children will, one day, be nonexistent. I will, also, be praying for your next childhood cancer victim; somewhere, there is another child laughing, playing and enjoying life and then in the blink of an eye, they are facing the sliding doors of an entrance to a children’s hospital, scared to death and looking over at their mother and asking, “When can we go home?” I will, also, pray for the families that are forced to witness their children suffer and die due to this horrific affliction. These families need prayer, guidance, peace, an answer….and for you to lose your strength and power.
Please do not bother to respond to this letter. Your words mean nothing to me, your presence is unwanted, and you will never be missed.
P.S. Don’t even think about getting anywhere near Allison and Ashley.